"STUNTMAN MIKE"
7 min AMRAP:
1 Shot of Patron
5 Kegstand Pushups
2 Arm curls (down a solo cup of beer in each hand)
10 burpees in a plate of beer (suck a little up on the bottom)
Scaled:
*1 shot of Patron in the very beginning
5 Kegstand Pushups
1 Arm curl (down a solo cup of beer in your hand)
5 burpees in a plate of beer (suck a little up on the bottom)
ALSO
An alternative work out will be a 10 minute...
DEATH BY BEER
First 30 seconds - 1 ounce of beer
Second 30 seconds - 2 ounces of beer
Third 30 seconds - 3 ounces of beer
...
Continue until you fail. When you fail start back at round one.
Record total ounces of beer completed.
SUCK IT!!!!!
--Stuntman Mike
Saturday, July 11, 2009
Friday, July 10, 2009
More updates
One of the great things about the Neptune is that they own the lot across the street and any visitors can park there. The problem is they decided to start a policy where you need a parking pass or else you get towed. So I decided to see if I could remedy the parking situation tomorrow. Not only did they say no to the extra parking passes (or my suggestion to call off the dogs tomorrow) they also didn't like the idea of me having a party. Fuck them. I made sure I wore a polo and my glasses so I could look extra nerdy and unassuming so they wouldn't have a clue what was really about to happen tomorrow.
So when life gives you lemons, you squeeze the lemon juice back in the eyes of life.
This is the new plan folks. We will partying on the edge of the Neptune property on Public Access 28. We will still be using the Neptune's grill and using my room (207) to store re-enforcements of booze and food. There are a number of parking accesses: 28,27,26,25. I also saw a pay lot near between 26 and 27. BRING YOUR QUARTERS FOR PUBLIC ACCESS!!!
Please bring coolers with ice. We can store extra stuff in them. If you have a folding table please bring it and let me know (560 5177) via phone or text (remember to include your name).
Please bring beach chairs and/or beach towels.
We will also probably start bouncing over to the bars a little earlier although the time on that is still up in the air.
Don't worry folks. If I get kicked out of the hotel, I will be honored. We will just move the party somewhere else.
Suck it NEPTUNE!
--Stuntman Mike
So when life gives you lemons, you squeeze the lemon juice back in the eyes of life.
This is the new plan folks. We will partying on the edge of the Neptune property on Public Access 28. We will still be using the Neptune's grill and using my room (207) to store re-enforcements of booze and food. There are a number of parking accesses: 28,27,26,25. I also saw a pay lot near between 26 and 27. BRING YOUR QUARTERS FOR PUBLIC ACCESS!!!
Please bring coolers with ice. We can store extra stuff in them. If you have a folding table please bring it and let me know (560 5177) via phone or text (remember to include your name).
Please bring beach chairs and/or beach towels.
We will also probably start bouncing over to the bars a little earlier although the time on that is still up in the air.
Don't worry folks. If I get kicked out of the hotel, I will be honored. We will just move the party somewhere else.
Suck it NEPTUNE!
--Stuntman Mike
The last weekend of my 20s
UPDATES!!!!!
Most of this evening will be spent at GCTC for Mariel's going away party not at the beach. See you there! See the coaches blog...
Rations for Saturday/Sunday
We will have:
A keg of Coors Light.
Plenty of Rum, Sweet tea vodka, Patron for shooting only (don't waste it on a margarita)
8 liters of coke / 8 liters of diet coke
Miami Vices if you get there early enough
Mint Juleps
Mojitos
10 lbs of Spanish pulled pork (very yummy)
6 lbs of burger meat
Brats
Buns, cheese, condiments
Sweet Potatoe home fries
Grilled peppers and onions
BBQ Beans
Potato Chips and French Onion Dip
Tortilla Chips and Salsa
Cake
CHEAT ALL YOU ZONE/PALEOS!
There are gas grills at the pool so if anything from that list doesn't appeal to you please feel free to bring and cook up what ever you would like. All sides welcome!
Special thanks to Rob and D$ for helping with logistics and covering expenses!!
The Stuntman Mike WOD, quasi-promptly at 1PM. Show up to throw up.
If you are coming in the evening and you show up at the Neptune and no one is there, we may have started the FMB waltz; give me a call 560 5177 to find out where we are on the island, we won't be too far. Someone should answer if I am incapacitated already.
SUCK IT!
My 30th birthday is almost one month away. I am not happy about this. Most people throw a big bash to celebrate the crappyness that they must grow up. Fuck that. Instead I am going to leave my 20s with a bang; you are all invited to witness or even take part if you have the balls.
When: July 10 - 12 (that's right bitches... we're partying all weekend)
The main festivities will be Saturday afternoon into the evening. Activities will include: drinking, grilling, sunning, swimming, shots (literally), keg stands, beer pong, beer bong, banana costumes, me running around with a bullhorn forcing you to drink, a musical performance by Therapists, and the soon to be iconic "Stuntman Mike WOD". Later in the evening we'll be waltzing down FMB bars. If this sounds too intense for you Sunday will probably just be beer, beach, and mojitos (as long as we don't get kicked out due to Saturday's shenanigans). Or attend both.
Where: Neptune Inn on Fort Myers Beach
If you don't know where that is... it is across from the the Heavenly Biscuit, one of the best little breakfast places in the area (Totally not zone/paleo but worth your cheat). What you don't know where the Biscuit is? Do I have to draw you a map? Here you lazy ass motherfucker: http://tiny.cc/8PA6l You will have to find somewhere to park, there are a few options around there.
Don't want to drive home drunk? There are still rooms available, I booked through hotels.com it was cheaper then directly through Neptune. It is about $100 a night.
Everyone is invited, don't be shy, bring your friends. All booze or food contributions will be greatly appreciated. No need to RSVP, I will see you brave fuckers there.
Suck it.
--Stuntman Mike
Most of this evening will be spent at GCTC for Mariel's going away party not at the beach. See you there! See the coaches blog...
Rations for Saturday/Sunday
We will have:
A keg of Coors Light.
Plenty of Rum, Sweet tea vodka, Patron for shooting only (don't waste it on a margarita)
8 liters of coke / 8 liters of diet coke
Miami Vices if you get there early enough
Mint Juleps
Mojitos
10 lbs of Spanish pulled pork (very yummy)
6 lbs of burger meat
Brats
Buns, cheese, condiments
Sweet Potatoe home fries
Grilled peppers and onions
BBQ Beans
Potato Chips and French Onion Dip
Tortilla Chips and Salsa
Cake
CHEAT ALL YOU ZONE/PALEOS!
There are gas grills at the pool so if anything from that list doesn't appeal to you please feel free to bring and cook up what ever you would like. All sides welcome!
Special thanks to Rob and D$ for helping with logistics and covering expenses!!
The Stuntman Mike WOD, quasi-promptly at 1PM. Show up to throw up.
If you are coming in the evening and you show up at the Neptune and no one is there, we may have started the FMB waltz; give me a call 560 5177 to find out where we are on the island, we won't be too far. Someone should answer if I am incapacitated already.
SUCK IT!
My 30th birthday is almost one month away. I am not happy about this. Most people throw a big bash to celebrate the crappyness that they must grow up. Fuck that. Instead I am going to leave my 20s with a bang; you are all invited to witness or even take part if you have the balls.
When: July 10 - 12 (that's right bitches... we're partying all weekend)
The main festivities will be Saturday afternoon into the evening. Activities will include: drinking, grilling, sunning, swimming, shots (literally), keg stands, beer pong, beer bong, banana costumes, me running around with a bullhorn forcing you to drink, a musical performance by Therapists, and the soon to be iconic "Stuntman Mike WOD". Later in the evening we'll be waltzing down FMB bars. If this sounds too intense for you Sunday will probably just be beer, beach, and mojitos (as long as we don't get kicked out due to Saturday's shenanigans). Or attend both.
Where: Neptune Inn on Fort Myers Beach
If you don't know where that is... it is across from the the Heavenly Biscuit, one of the best little breakfast places in the area (Totally not zone/paleo but worth your cheat). What you don't know where the Biscuit is? Do I have to draw you a map? Here you lazy ass motherfucker: http://tiny.cc/8PA6l You will have to find somewhere to park, there are a few options around there.
Don't want to drive home drunk? There are still rooms available, I booked through hotels.com it was cheaper then directly through Neptune. It is about $100 a night.
Everyone is invited, don't be shy, bring your friends. All booze or food contributions will be greatly appreciated. No need to RSVP, I will see you brave fuckers there.
Suck it.
--Stuntman Mike
Good bye 20s
Today's punishment:
TGIF - Triple Modality
For total reps:
3 minutes Max Rep CNJ @ 83/135
3 minutes Rest
3 minutes Max Rep Burpees
3 minutes Rest
3 minutes Max Calorie Row
Done!
Result: 93 @ 115 lbs
Pukey Scale: 3.5 of 5
Total suck. My next CF WOD will be at age 30. Good to work out with Mariel one last time. Good luck in Tampa! I will see all you bitches tonight. And over the weekend.
Suck it
--Stuntman Mike
Result: 93 @ 115 lbs
Pukey Scale: 3.5 of 5
Total suck. My next CF WOD will be at age 30. Good to work out with Mariel one last time. Good luck in Tampa! I will see all you bitches tonight. And over the weekend.
Suck it
--Stuntman Mike
Thursday, July 9, 2009
CrossFit Conspiracy
Today's punishment:
Four rounds for time of:
Four rounds for time of:
Run 400-Meters
50 Air Squats
Result: 16:22
Pukey scale: 3 of 5
So a shit storm was a brewing at work. I worked late last night and had to get into work early this morning. Unfortunately I knew I didn't have time for going into CFFM this morning so as a compromise I decided to run a mile. When I looked on the WOD blog I saw that both the CFFM and CF Main site said to run 400 then do 50 squats four times. Guess what folks, 400 m x 4 = 1600 m ~ 1 mile. So some how Jason conspired and knew that I wasn't going to make it and was able to make my compromising workout harder. WTF! Does he have a bug in my brain or something? Am I under survailence by the CFBI? Well I was oblidged to break up my mile run into 1/4 miles and do 50 squats after each 1/4 mile.
This sucked. Also I didn't bring any water on my run so that sucked even more. Fuck you Jason, I don't know how you pulled this off but I am convinced you are more evil than ever! D$ will probably post some ridiculous time and say how he did it at noon and didn't require water. That is because he is not human and when skynet takes over I will be the first one to take his ass out with Thermite.
Suck it.
--Stuntman Mike
Result: 16:22
Pukey scale: 3 of 5
So a shit storm was a brewing at work. I worked late last night and had to get into work early this morning. Unfortunately I knew I didn't have time for going into CFFM this morning so as a compromise I decided to run a mile. When I looked on the WOD blog I saw that both the CFFM and CF Main site said to run 400 then do 50 squats four times. Guess what folks, 400 m x 4 = 1600 m ~ 1 mile. So some how Jason conspired and knew that I wasn't going to make it and was able to make my compromising workout harder. WTF! Does he have a bug in my brain or something? Am I under survailence by the CFBI? Well I was oblidged to break up my mile run into 1/4 miles and do 50 squats after each 1/4 mile.
This sucked. Also I didn't bring any water on my run so that sucked even more. Fuck you Jason, I don't know how you pulled this off but I am convinced you are more evil than ever! D$ will probably post some ridiculous time and say how he did it at noon and didn't require water. That is because he is not human and when skynet takes over I will be the first one to take his ass out with Thermite.
Suck it.
--Stuntman Mike
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
New PR... W00T!!!!!!11!!!11!!1!!!!1!!!
Yesterday's punishment:
Today's workout:
We haven't done heavy 1 rep dead lifts in a while so I figured I would be PRing today. Still its a damn good feeling. My PR from December was 230. I beat that on my second rep. My new PR is 250 (that is 20 lbs over the last one if you suck at math).
Oh I decided the original "Stuntman Mike" WOD might kill D$ so I decided to scale it back some. This was the original:
20 Min AMRAP
1 Shot of Patron
5 Kegstand Pushups
2 Arm curls (down a solo cup of beer in each hand)
10 burpees
Must stop if you puke.
I will come up with something equally sadistic but slightly safer... only slightly.
Suck it.
--Stuntman Mike
AMRAP in 15 minutes of:
*Row 500-Meters [once]
15 KBS @ 16K/24K
10 Box Jumps @ 20"
5 Pull-Ups
Result: 5 rounds
Pukey Scale: 2.5 of 5
Result: 5 rounds
Pukey Scale: 2.5 of 5
Today's workout:
H-E-A-V-Y Deadlifts
1-1-1-1-1-1-1
Result: 225 - 235 (new PR) - 245 (new PR) - 250 FAIL - 250 FAIL - 245 - 250 (new PR)
Pukey Scale: 0
Good past couple of days at CF. Yesterday, I felt pretty solid with the work out. The commie swings went better than expected. I broke them up into 8/7 sets and kept with it for the most part. No back pain today so that meant I must have done them right. Work was crazy yesterday so I didn't have time to post. I think I was staring at the screen too long because I got a nasty migraine at the end of the evening. Sleeping it off didn't really help too much, when my fucking alarm went off my head was still pounding. I slept in, took some Excedrin, and headed to the gym at 7am.
Result: 225 - 235 (new PR) - 245 (new PR) - 250 FAIL - 250 FAIL - 245 - 250 (new PR)
Pukey Scale: 0
Good past couple of days at CF. Yesterday, I felt pretty solid with the work out. The commie swings went better than expected. I broke them up into 8/7 sets and kept with it for the most part. No back pain today so that meant I must have done them right. Work was crazy yesterday so I didn't have time to post. I think I was staring at the screen too long because I got a nasty migraine at the end of the evening. Sleeping it off didn't really help too much, when my fucking alarm went off my head was still pounding. I slept in, took some Excedrin, and headed to the gym at 7am.
We haven't done heavy 1 rep dead lifts in a while so I figured I would be PRing today. Still its a damn good feeling. My PR from December was 230. I beat that on my second rep. My new PR is 250 (that is 20 lbs over the last one if you suck at math).
Oh I decided the original "Stuntman Mike" WOD might kill D$ so I decided to scale it back some. This was the original:
20 Min AMRAP
1 Shot of Patron
5 Kegstand Pushups
2 Arm curls (down a solo cup of beer in each hand)
10 burpees
Must stop if you puke.
I will come up with something equally sadistic but slightly safer... only slightly.
Suck it.
--Stuntman Mike
Monday, July 6, 2009
An ode to Sarah
Today's punishment:
My Result: 25:41 @ 95lbs (still paying for the bear complex)
My pukey scale rating: 3.5 of 5
Sarah's Result: 12:19 @ RX'd
Sarah's pukey scale rating: 2.5 of 5 (due to rough weekend with Sam Adams)
While Michele is the official representative of CFFM, undoubtedly, the cheerleader of CrossFit For Masochists is Sarah. I first met Sarah at a Friday afternoon class, I randomly attended. At this point I was on the twice a week plan which was pure laziness by me. She was there doing extra work. That concept was so foreign to me, regular Crossfit twice a week was punishment enough, how did she go five times a week and show up in the afternoon for extra work with MK. Lunacy, I tell you, lunacy. At the beginning of 2009, I pushed forward from two days to four and found that she and MK did extra work a lot. Man, I am a slacker, I wasn't even at five yet.
Eventually, I decided to grow up a little and wake my ass up early to work out at 6 AM. This was the only way I could make it five days a week and be able to live the rest of my life (I live in Estero and work in Naples so the commute was eating a lot of my day). I can't remember what the first work out was but I do remember it ended up being a five on the pukey scale. Sarah and the rest of the 6 AM'ers crushed it. I tried to keep up. I puked. Welcome to 6 AM.
Working out with them was intimidating and I could have easily retreated back to my 7 PM class ***No disrespect to 7PM. At the time the current wave of my fellow classmates had just started so they were still being shown the ropes (literally in some cases) so I felt I could hang confidently, now your class is beast-like too!*** Sarah, however, is definitely the unofficial cheerleader for the 6 AM crew. During the work out, while most of us can't even breath, she shouts words of encouragement to the rest of class. And when she finishes way before everyone else (except usually MK) she cheers the rest of us on. She and the rest of the class made me feel very welcome at 6 AM and help keep me going when I am so sleepy.
One thing Sarah does, which you may not realize, is she bears the most of Jason's sadistic tendencies for us and defies him (although sometimes I worry this only encourages more evil tactics). Sarah can not be broken. What ever Jason throws at her she will crush and crush it humbly. She also encourages the rest of the class to stand up against that asshole and beat him at his own game. More often than not she has pushed me to try for more weight or re-enforced my sheepish desire to try RX'd more often; she even prodded me into the conquering of the 24K kettle bell, fucking commies. For those of you that have had the honor to work out with Sarah you know that she easily cuts a minute or two off your time if you foolishly attempt to keep up. I usually try to every morning. Today, I basically doubled her time (that is not a good thing), which means I failed my "don't double Sarah's time" daily benchmark. After she finished instead of hyperventilating by the fan like I would, she cheered me on until I finally finished. Then she did some ring dips for shit and giggles. Masochist.
Suck it.
--Stuntman Mike
For time:
Thruster/Sprint
10-9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1
10 Thrusters @ 83/135
Sprint 100-Meters
9 Thrusters
Sprint 100-M
8 Thrusters
Sprint 100-M .....
1 Thruster
Sprint 100-M
My Result: 25:41 @ 95lbs (still paying for the bear complex)
My pukey scale rating: 3.5 of 5
Sarah's Result: 12:19 @ RX'd
Sarah's pukey scale rating: 2.5 of 5 (due to rough weekend with Sam Adams)
While Michele is the official representative of CFFM, undoubtedly, the cheerleader of CrossFit For Masochists is Sarah. I first met Sarah at a Friday afternoon class, I randomly attended. At this point I was on the twice a week plan which was pure laziness by me. She was there doing extra work. That concept was so foreign to me, regular Crossfit twice a week was punishment enough, how did she go five times a week and show up in the afternoon for extra work with MK. Lunacy, I tell you, lunacy. At the beginning of 2009, I pushed forward from two days to four and found that she and MK did extra work a lot. Man, I am a slacker, I wasn't even at five yet.
Eventually, I decided to grow up a little and wake my ass up early to work out at 6 AM. This was the only way I could make it five days a week and be able to live the rest of my life (I live in Estero and work in Naples so the commute was eating a lot of my day). I can't remember what the first work out was but I do remember it ended up being a five on the pukey scale. Sarah and the rest of the 6 AM'ers crushed it. I tried to keep up. I puked. Welcome to 6 AM.
Working out with them was intimidating and I could have easily retreated back to my 7 PM class ***No disrespect to 7PM. At the time the current wave of my fellow classmates had just started so they were still being shown the ropes (literally in some cases) so I felt I could hang confidently, now your class is beast-like too!*** Sarah, however, is definitely the unofficial cheerleader for the 6 AM crew. During the work out, while most of us can't even breath, she shouts words of encouragement to the rest of class. And when she finishes way before everyone else (except usually MK) she cheers the rest of us on. She and the rest of the class made me feel very welcome at 6 AM and help keep me going when I am so sleepy.
One thing Sarah does, which you may not realize, is she bears the most of Jason's sadistic tendencies for us and defies him (although sometimes I worry this only encourages more evil tactics). Sarah can not be broken. What ever Jason throws at her she will crush and crush it humbly. She also encourages the rest of the class to stand up against that asshole and beat him at his own game. More often than not she has pushed me to try for more weight or re-enforced my sheepish desire to try RX'd more often; she even prodded me into the conquering of the 24K kettle bell, fucking commies. For those of you that have had the honor to work out with Sarah you know that she easily cuts a minute or two off your time if you foolishly attempt to keep up. I usually try to every morning. Today, I basically doubled her time (that is not a good thing), which means I failed my "don't double Sarah's time" daily benchmark. After she finished instead of hyperventilating by the fan like I would, she cheered me on until I finally finished. Then she did some ring dips for shit and giggles. Masochist.
Suck it.
--Stuntman Mike
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)